The universal taxi driver shister agreement

Teksi shmeksi

What is it about driving a cab that makes you a stubborn jerk? Who wrote that universal code of conduct that requires anyone who works as a driver, of any sort, to try to scam the passengers at every given opportunity?

And, more amazingly, why do they all have such a terrible sense of direction?

In our experience, in every country we've been to so far, more or less, we've encountered a number of tuk tuk drivers, taxi drivers and bus conductors who did their damndest to pull a fast one on us.

Ok, granted, when you do show up with a big old shiny backpack and money belt at the ready, you've got to expect the opportunists to step into gear. And over charging is hardly something only drivers try to do. But when you've clearly bothered to learn some local greetings, are obviously interested in their culture and their country, and in all good faith step into their smelly little sanctum of dangly religious mirror beads and closet love songs, you kind of expect a little bit of respect, really.

Even more infuriatingly, a shocking number of drivers have absolutely no idea of how to read maps. Er... What?! From the puzzled look we keep getting from our drivers, we might as well have showed them a picture of Scooby Doo and asked to be taken to him.

And, most annoying of all, there is a general tendency of drivers to not to never ever admit defeat. Rather than tell you they don't know, they will sheepishly make some measly lie up. They would rather drive half an hour in clearly the wrong direction, than pull over and ask a passer-by for help.

Understandably, spending your day sitting in traffic jams, listening to continuous honking and lifting heavy bags for ungrateful foreigners, might well irritate the most well-balanced pacifist. But surely that's not the way to spend your life. That's what the jangly karma bits hanging from the mirror and the sweet love songs are there to counter act, no?

If drivers would want to steal our money then please just do it properly. Pull over, shove a gun in our face, tie us up by the road side and take our luggage. Otherwise just please get on with it and drive us where we need to go, at a reasonable cost, you jangly cowboys of the road.